All Cast
JJ Feild
Liam Adams
Leo Gregory
Charlie Braithwaite
Kuno Becker
Santiago Munez
Kasia Smutniak
Sophia Tardelli
Anya Lahiri
June
Nick Moran
Nick Ashworth
Christopher Fairbank
Foghorn
Mike Elliot
Gordon
Craig Heaney
Phil
Jack McBride
Walter
Tamer Hassan
Ronnie
Ori Pfeffer
Mad Film Director
John Salthouse
Newcastle Manager
Gary Lewis
Mal Braithwaite
Tereza Srbova
Katja
Margo Stilley
Tamzin Adams
Olivia Phillips
Bella
Antonia Bernath
Britt
Sam Cunningham
Helga
Mellissa Laycy
Agnetha
Erin Lister
Ani-Frid
Jakki Degg
Cute Masseuse
Anna Maria Everett
Old Masseuse
Gabrielle Richens
Marjorie
Paul McGavin
1st AD Commercial
Tia Thomas
Production assistant
Paul Humpoletz
LADA Taxi Driver
Brett Morton
Runner
Dave Sansom
Film Sound Man
Bruce Jackson
1st Assistant Director
Joemma Lavin
Hull Barmaid
Daniel Cowley
Paramedic
Rob Jones
Vicar
Phil Matthews
Sports Reporter
John Motson
Self
Matthew Waters
Reporter 1
Anna Tyler
Reporter 2
Derek Williams
Sven
Brian Newbold
Registrar
Deita Hubbard
German Barmaid 1
Kerry Shepherd
German Barmaid 2
Cliff Bradley
Irate Skoda Driver
Peter Heslop
Unhappy Driver
Russell De Rozario
Bucharest Boiler
Adam Marusiak
Footballer
Anthony Ofei
Footballer
Craig Palmer
Footballer
Dennis Sweeney
Footballer
Emeka Ejiofor
Footballer
Gareth Ellis
Footballer
Holden Ashley Stein
Footballer
Jamie Poole
Footballer
Lee White
Footballer
Leigh Clayton
Footballer
Liam Moynihan
Footballer
Matthew Thorpe
Footballer
Nathan Wint
Footballer
Neil Elson
Footballer
Oliver Jones
Footballer
Steve Madden
Footballer
Toby George Jones
Footballer
David Beckham
Self
John Terry
Self
Frank Lampard
Self
Jamie Carragher
Self
Paul Robinson
Self
Owen Hargreaves
Self
Peter Crouch
Self
Rio Ferdinand
Self
Joe Cole
Self
Gary Neville
Self
Ray Clemence
Self
Jermaine Jenas
Self
Aaron Lennon
Self
Wayne Bridge
Self
Steven Gerrard
Self
Wayne Rooney
Self
Sven-Göran Eriksson
Self
Ronaldo
Self
Hernán Crespo
Self
John Aloisi
Self
Fernando Torres
Self
Thierry Henry
Self
Filippo Inzaghi
Self
Ruud van Nistelrooy
Self
Olof Mellberg
Self
Henrik Larsson
Self
Cristiano Ronaldo
Self
Andrew Shue
(uncredited)