Shelley Long
Molly Emerson
Brandon de Paul
Mike Emerson
Corbin Bernsen
Chief Spivak
Dick Van Patten
Santa Claus
Talbot Perry Simons
Clifford the Inebriated
Sonny Carl Davis
Officer Buckley
Steve Monroe
Officer Calhoun
Martin Klebba
Elf Ranger Bob
Adrienne Barbeau
Alice the Homeless Mom
Alana Austin
Carla the Assistant
Colton James
Marty the Hospital Teen
Joe Virzi
Trash Talking Teddy (voice)
Patricia Gillum
Boutique Person